You’re not supposed to be too loud you’re not supposed to be too demanding you’re not supposed to complain you’re not supposed to speak up you’re not supposed to be emotional you can’t be too assertive aggressive or ambitious. If so, you are seen as ” troublesome” you can’t be too sexual. you have to be modest and quiet and shy and obedient. You can’t be too friendly or else someone might mistake that for sexual interest. You have to smile less and agree more. You also have to time your words when you speak up because you are only allowed to speak at certain moments when it’s appropriate. If it makes others uncomfortable its your fault and it’s better not to say anything because comfort is  where we should be where everyone should be. It’s better to be silent and compliant and pretend it doesnT exist and we shouldn’t talk about it because it makes people squirm or feel attacked. And why didn’t you say anything before? Like why say it now? Don’t we have a schedule for these kinds of things? Weren’t you going to send a memo to warn me at least? Why can’t we go back to when you were just pretty and had no opinion?

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