The start of a paper collage I’m working on across my wall.
I’ve made some realizations this weekend and things became very clear for me. I think slowing down because I was sick and being alone has given me the time and space to find clarity. I know what it is that makes me happy and so I need to pursue it in every way possible however little I do every day. I read Schopenhauer this weekend and often took breaks to work with my hands (either cooking or making the flowers) and it was very meditative for me. i think this is probably my truest self which is one of independent thinking and making connections through writing. And also that certain activities in which I use my hands feel very pure and true to self because there is no intellectual thought; the moment is tied to the making. And I saw this divide of doing and thinking: one Which is free and open ended and Another which is about not thinking but making and I realized that that was my happy place. And it all made sense to me suddenly and it was like I was waving hi to this self I had never met before.